Many of you know that for the last few years I have been in constant pain. I have gone to every doctor out there, had test after test taken, and given every pill you can think of. All for nothing. No one could figure out what was causing the pain or how to make it stop. Recently a doctor believes that I have a problem with my nerves. They fire incorrectly, which causes me pain. So at any moment different things I touch can set my nerves off, causing me hours of pain.
The pain has been so bad that i have actually been stuck at the grocery store. I had to call Eric, have him finish the the shopping for me. I spent 2 hours in the Spanish Fork bathroom that day before the pain was tolerable enough that i could drive home. Because I never know when the pain is going to hit, i am extremely paranoid about going somewhere that is far from my house.
This last week, the pain has intensified. Usually the pain will last for about 2 hours, then fade to a dull ache. This last week though, it is a constant pain. I wasn't even able to lay on my stomach. Which has never been a problem before.
Ok so you get the point that its intense pain. So this past week, I started reading this book Bryndi gave me last year for Christmas. Its call To Him That Believeth. It is all about faith, and claiming blessings from Heaven. One of the stories in the book talked about a girl that had paralyzed her arm a few day before a big Television production her choir was participating in. She was the pianist. Her dad advised her to get a blessing, and visualize herself playing the piano the day of the recording. She did just that, and when it came for their turn to play, she was able to play her piece with no problems. What faith!
So yesterday I put this into practice. I had been healthy all day. Pain was at a dull ache level, so I was excited for a birthday dinner we had with our friends. 10 minutes before we were supposed to leave however my body had a different idea. I refuse to let my body control my life, so i started praying and thought this would be a great moment to exercise my faith. So i visualized myself at the restaurant with our friends, sitting at the table, enjoying their company, and my body not hurting. I told Eric that I was ready to go, and that by the time i got to the restaurant my body wouldn't hurt. It was a brutal car ride, but i just kept praying and seeing myself at the restaurant free of pain. By the time we got there, the pain had subsided into a dull ache. I was able to enjoy our dinner and our friends company.
I know that this was not a coincidence. I know beyond any doubt that my faith really did make me whole. If only for that moment. I have a new understanding of excercising your faith. Its the same as regular exercise, if I had to sprint to the corner for whatever reason, I could. But if i wanted to sprint for a long distance, i would need to push myself. This experience was like that, i was able to sprint to the corner. But my end goal is to be able to sustain this level of faith for an extended time. Just like the first time you sprint further then you have better, seeing results on my exercising my faith is addictive. I want to continue to push on, to see if next time i can keep the pain at bay for an entire day. Little steps until i can have enough faith to be healed. That will be an amazing day.
The pain has been so bad that i have actually been stuck at the grocery store. I had to call Eric, have him finish the the shopping for me. I spent 2 hours in the Spanish Fork bathroom that day before the pain was tolerable enough that i could drive home. Because I never know when the pain is going to hit, i am extremely paranoid about going somewhere that is far from my house.
This last week, the pain has intensified. Usually the pain will last for about 2 hours, then fade to a dull ache. This last week though, it is a constant pain. I wasn't even able to lay on my stomach. Which has never been a problem before.
Ok so you get the point that its intense pain. So this past week, I started reading this book Bryndi gave me last year for Christmas. Its call To Him That Believeth. It is all about faith, and claiming blessings from Heaven. One of the stories in the book talked about a girl that had paralyzed her arm a few day before a big Television production her choir was participating in. She was the pianist. Her dad advised her to get a blessing, and visualize herself playing the piano the day of the recording. She did just that, and when it came for their turn to play, she was able to play her piece with no problems. What faith!
So yesterday I put this into practice. I had been healthy all day. Pain was at a dull ache level, so I was excited for a birthday dinner we had with our friends. 10 minutes before we were supposed to leave however my body had a different idea. I refuse to let my body control my life, so i started praying and thought this would be a great moment to exercise my faith. So i visualized myself at the restaurant with our friends, sitting at the table, enjoying their company, and my body not hurting. I told Eric that I was ready to go, and that by the time i got to the restaurant my body wouldn't hurt. It was a brutal car ride, but i just kept praying and seeing myself at the restaurant free of pain. By the time we got there, the pain had subsided into a dull ache. I was able to enjoy our dinner and our friends company.
I know that this was not a coincidence. I know beyond any doubt that my faith really did make me whole. If only for that moment. I have a new understanding of excercising your faith. Its the same as regular exercise, if I had to sprint to the corner for whatever reason, I could. But if i wanted to sprint for a long distance, i would need to push myself. This experience was like that, i was able to sprint to the corner. But my end goal is to be able to sustain this level of faith for an extended time. Just like the first time you sprint further then you have better, seeing results on my exercising my faith is addictive. I want to continue to push on, to see if next time i can keep the pain at bay for an entire day. Little steps until i can have enough faith to be healed. That will be an amazing day.
